I kept a secret from some of my friends. I'm interacting with a guy that I'm not proud to claim. You know the type...cocky asshole but for some reason you answer his calls!
I thought that by hiding my interaction with him from my friends was helping me avoid the "you're too good for him" lecture.
But all my secret did was hold up a mirror. It showed me the kind of girl I was being to tolerate the kind of man I was dealing with. Okay...the kind of man I AM dealing with.
Now I'm not saying I've cut this guy off, but I am saying...once my friends found me out, it made me realize that I've GOT to demand more of the men of my life for many reasons, but one of the most important ones is so that he can be a guy I'm proud to talk to my friends about.
Because what good is a guy if you can't gossip about him with your girls?!
Monday, February 8, 2010
Working Girl
****SPOILER ALERT: IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN TONIGHT'S EPISODE OF THE BACHELOR STOP READING***
Tonight on the Bachelor (yes I watch...don't judge me) one of the girls found out she had to go back to work.
She had to choose between staying on a show where she thought she'd met the man of her dreams or going back to her job.
The girl is in the final 4, so if you know reality dating shows you know that's pretty much the thick of the competition.
The girl chose to go back to her job. At one point she said, I could stay here and walk away with nothing if Jake doesn't pick me or I could walk away now and still have a job.
DEEP! What would you guys do? Would you risk your career for love?? Not even love...the possibility of love because she really had no idea if Jake would pick her in the end.
Tonight on the Bachelor (yes I watch...don't judge me) one of the girls found out she had to go back to work.
She had to choose between staying on a show where she thought she'd met the man of her dreams or going back to her job.
The girl is in the final 4, so if you know reality dating shows you know that's pretty much the thick of the competition.
The girl chose to go back to her job. At one point she said, I could stay here and walk away with nothing if Jake doesn't pick me or I could walk away now and still have a job.
DEEP! What would you guys do? Would you risk your career for love?? Not even love...the possibility of love because she really had no idea if Jake would pick her in the end.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Nightmare
You ever have a dream about a guy you are involved with and it just seems all too real?
My friend had this experience and it made me think of a nightmare I once had.
I was at a party with this guy I was dating and he started dancing with this girl, I then saw him leading her away. When I confronted him about it, he said she was too fly not to have sex with and that it was just sex so I should relax. It was one of those dreams that I had to force myself to wake up from because it was so devastating.
Looking back...that dream revealed my insecurities about that relationship. I told my friend, anytime you dream about a guy you are involved with, it is reflecting what is on your mind about the relationship. Now if you dream a guy cheats, it doesn't mean he is cheating, it just means you don't trust him. Sometimes you can look at your dreams like a mirror to your own life, they show you the problems you need to address.
My friend had this experience and it made me think of a nightmare I once had.
I was at a party with this guy I was dating and he started dancing with this girl, I then saw him leading her away. When I confronted him about it, he said she was too fly not to have sex with and that it was just sex so I should relax. It was one of those dreams that I had to force myself to wake up from because it was so devastating.
Looking back...that dream revealed my insecurities about that relationship. I told my friend, anytime you dream about a guy you are involved with, it is reflecting what is on your mind about the relationship. Now if you dream a guy cheats, it doesn't mean he is cheating, it just means you don't trust him. Sometimes you can look at your dreams like a mirror to your own life, they show you the problems you need to address.
Heated Debate
I work in journalism. When people find this out, they often want to tell me everything they find wrong with my business...but I'm not bitter.
Last night, this guy tells me he doesn't like it on the news when we don't mention a suspects race. If you haven't noticed. If we don't have a photo of a suspect, and the police just tell us they are looking for a 20 year old white man, we will just tell the public that police are looking for a 20 year old man. The theory is, that him being white will do nothing to help people identify him because there are thousands of 20 year old white men roaming the streets.
Now if he was a 20 year old white man with a scar on his left cheek....then we would include all of those details because that's enough information to help the public identify this guy.
The guy that I was debating with said he doesn't think it's fair to withhold information, if the police give a description we need to share all of it.
I told him I don't think it's fair for all the 20 year old white men out there to release such a generic description. It's those types of descriptions that make certain races get followed around a store when they are shopping or lead women to cross the street when a black man is walking down the street.
In my opinion, the type of journalism I'm practicing is making people more aware of ALL people. You shouldn't just cross the street if a black man is headed your way, I cross the street if any man is walking my way.
What do you guys think?
Last night, this guy tells me he doesn't like it on the news when we don't mention a suspects race. If you haven't noticed. If we don't have a photo of a suspect, and the police just tell us they are looking for a 20 year old white man, we will just tell the public that police are looking for a 20 year old man. The theory is, that him being white will do nothing to help people identify him because there are thousands of 20 year old white men roaming the streets.
Now if he was a 20 year old white man with a scar on his left cheek....then we would include all of those details because that's enough information to help the public identify this guy.
The guy that I was debating with said he doesn't think it's fair to withhold information, if the police give a description we need to share all of it.
I told him I don't think it's fair for all the 20 year old white men out there to release such a generic description. It's those types of descriptions that make certain races get followed around a store when they are shopping or lead women to cross the street when a black man is walking down the street.
In my opinion, the type of journalism I'm practicing is making people more aware of ALL people. You shouldn't just cross the street if a black man is headed your way, I cross the street if any man is walking my way.
What do you guys think?
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Crutch
I was thinking about cutting my hair. I have long hair, to the middle of my back. And I was looking in the mirror thinking of chopping it off to like my chin.
After imagining myself with this hair cut I had to stop. I realized that my hair is my crutch. As a woman...I've come to view it as something that makes me special. I'm the girl with long hair. Then, my thoughts turn to fear. What if I cut off my hair and there's nothing special about me anymore? I'm just another girl...
Sure I know I have great qualities but this is how my mind works.
So my hair is my crutch. Now do I challenge myself, force myself to deal with this crutch and chop off my hair or do i accept the fact that I am dependent on my hair and that's the way it will always be.
After imagining myself with this hair cut I had to stop. I realized that my hair is my crutch. As a woman...I've come to view it as something that makes me special. I'm the girl with long hair. Then, my thoughts turn to fear. What if I cut off my hair and there's nothing special about me anymore? I'm just another girl...
Sure I know I have great qualities but this is how my mind works.
So my hair is my crutch. Now do I challenge myself, force myself to deal with this crutch and chop off my hair or do i accept the fact that I am dependent on my hair and that's the way it will always be.
Go The Distance
I was talking to a friend about this blog...and she thought maybe it crossed the line of too much information. But in our society...we make things taboo that shouldn't be taboo.
Men talk about their sexual conquests all the time. That's why they are all on the same page and able to play this "game." I think we as women need to share our experiences so that we too are all on the same page and know what's normal and what's not normal. That's part of the reason I wrote the pillow talk blog.
Today's topic...what's your longest sexual experience. My friend, we'll call her Nicole, was with a guy for 3 hours. I'm not talking 3 hours of multiple sessions...one session, start to finish...3 hours.
Is that normal?
Men talk about their sexual conquests all the time. That's why they are all on the same page and able to play this "game." I think we as women need to share our experiences so that we too are all on the same page and know what's normal and what's not normal. That's part of the reason I wrote the pillow talk blog.
Today's topic...what's your longest sexual experience. My friend, we'll call her Nicole, was with a guy for 3 hours. I'm not talking 3 hours of multiple sessions...one session, start to finish...3 hours.
Is that normal?
Friday, February 5, 2010
Get Da Steppin
I've been watching a lot of reruns of Martin lately. On the show, Martin is known for being VERY mean to his girlfriends best friend Pam.
He insults her appearance, her breath, he kicks her out his house. It's some of the rudest, yet funniest thing to ever be on T.V.
The interesting thing is that Gina, Martin's girlfriend, allows him to talk to her best friend like this.
How do you guys feel about a guy who isn't nice to your friend?
A guy I was not dating but not not dating, recently kicked my friend out his house. Rude, right?
I think how your man treats your friends says a lot about how he feels about you BUT on Martin...it's clear that Martin LOVES Gina.
So is it possible for a guy to like you and not your friends?
He insults her appearance, her breath, he kicks her out his house. It's some of the rudest, yet funniest thing to ever be on T.V.
The interesting thing is that Gina, Martin's girlfriend, allows him to talk to her best friend like this.
How do you guys feel about a guy who isn't nice to your friend?
A guy I was not dating but not not dating, recently kicked my friend out his house. Rude, right?
I think how your man treats your friends says a lot about how he feels about you BUT on Martin...it's clear that Martin LOVES Gina.
So is it possible for a guy to like you and not your friends?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
